Tale been Fixed



As if a life of any single human being could be so complicated

I consider my pain was the worst from any other

I was ugly, I was the fatty, I was nobody

I found my struggle was the hardest

To be pretty, to be healthy

To get an A for every single test

To be the most devoted to God

To be creative

To bring a leadership in me

To be the best of human being

To be, I was just thinking that have to be something


But failure makes my time stop

Put me in the upper level of an anxiety


Aksi a sin comes

Force my time bursting

It sucks my dignity

Degrade myself down, as if my heart lose its conscious part

The sin, convince myself that I am no good for anybody


Once the sin shout:

‘You are a liar’

For every time i struggle more to be somewhat okay me


Another time the sin curse:

‘God doesn’t give any love to person like you’


My heart fall down

My brain even falling faster

Think that I have to stop my pray

Considering my self was too dirty


But then God talk to me

He said I am selfish

And at that very moment He slap me with His hug

He plead me guilty with all His love

Utmost, He forgive me


He then showed me world

He showed me other human’s fate that he is created

He bring me to bbc world to explain what is struggle and what is despair

But he remember my little neighbor as far as three doors from my house has no schools and no parents

Plausibly, He shout at me

‘You are nothing to be hug, You are fine, You are even finer

Put yourself together and stand up, I send you someone!’


The person that come is almost like an angel

Or maybe an angel that more likely to be known as a person


He then, keenly soothing in exposing me

Till I find its hard to realize that I’ve been expose to my very own self and to him

he impose me to be kind to myself

To love my self

To accept what I have

To give God another hug

To give myself a hug

To be okay when things are okay

And to be okay when things are not okay


In my very first milestone as a layperson in my own messy world

I found myself braveness

I found myself love

Through a sincere confession

Where an honesty exist


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