Slow Motion

As Millennial, i felt a great burden to be someone great in early age. I spend the last four years to tell myself that i could be someone great soon, but until now i am not. I realized that for those years, i spend more of my time dreaming rather than building the dreams. I created ideas, i searched for possibilities without having focus on finishing it, i made myself busy with too many things. And then two years ago comes as the year of regrets, i question myself with a full realization that i am lost. But again my approach on having my dream comes true was wrong; i was back to multitasking, doing anything in order to achieve everything. Maybe i was in denial for losing my self, not knowing what to do to achieve the dream.

I am a person who strongly believes in altruism ; according to my prophet SAW, the best human being is the most useful one. So for me being alone wasn’t a choice, doing nothing was prohibited.It scared me so much until the idea of knowing that i am not useful and not inspire anyone make me depressed. It took me a lot of time to understand and to finally see the silver lining behind it. Solitude bring peace to me so that i can finally enjoy building my dream, without no one pushing it, without any deadline.

It is the process that counts, not the result.

I feel so stupid when i realize this, i know about this idea since i was in high school.

It is even stated in Quran Surah At-Taubah ayah 105. And say, “Do [as you will], for Allah will see your deeds, and [so, will] His Messenger and the believers. And you will be returned to the Knower of the unseen and the witnessed, and He will inform you of what you used to do.

How can i forget?

Either i published my book when i was 15 or i published it when i am 50; it’s all gonna be the same as long as i keep working on it at my best. The beauty indeed lies in the process, I wrote my (not yet published) book since three years ago; if i would finished it instantly the book will be so raw since i didn’t have chance to meet the character and the setting that is so similiar to what i write. Putting aside this book for a year or two in fact is a great bless, i got a chance to see how bad the chapter 1 is before the editor sees it.

Their process to succeed is to fail

The process is the one who make JK Rowling tough; all the rejection that she got is the thing that make sure Harry Potgiter end up to the right publisher. When i find out that Sofia Coppola just have five movies, i was shocked, at first at thought that hey she isn’t that productive but then i realize that those five movies are great! She took her time to make high quality movies rather produce often but its shitty. Julia Child was a boring house wife in a foreign country before she could create a recipe book of all time. It took Oprah a tough childhood and 10 years of working experiences before she could make a show that last for 25 years. And i always have to remember that Emily Dickinson works was not praised until she is dead.

I come to understand that there is no instant process. Time is the one who differ and who inspire. Process doesn’t have to always be a marathon. Doing our process in slow motion could give us chance to savor the small detail and further the infinite. So far, i feel that taking long process for building a dream is equal to living in magical world.

Ok, now i am going back to my magical world, hope you got one too.

Love, Azmi

PS: Lynn Monahan, a fellow American blogger writes her interpretation about this post here. Her experience on taking it slow is way cooler than mine.

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12 thoughts on “Slow Motion

  1. Pingback: I hear you.. | finallyflorida

  2. Wow, why our mind are like synchronizing today? I realized this at many times. I have to be succeeded, building new dreams and goals everyday but almost no progress. Ha.ha. Thank you so much, Azmi, for reminding me 🙂

  3. It’s so inspiring! Thank you so much for it! I do struggle to be a good writer, n I’m learning many things. In English you are already great! Yes everything need process , so enjoy its process, insha’Allah your sun will come soon. 😊

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