May Brainstorming

Oh my poor little blog, after dozens of posts in one month i just abandoned this blog for another month.

And here i am making a come back post! But this isn’t apology post, nor a post to give out promises that i will blogging everyday in this month; this is figuring things out kinda post (that’s how you supposed to make a come back right?). My May was hectic; it’s not that i am busy doing something, but i was busy figuring things out! Nothing that i planned is finished, but then (for my comfort) i keep telling my self everything will be done this month. I believe on this month not just because June is my birth month, but June is also Ramadhan and summer!!!More sunshine means more productivity (and less sleep), isn’t it? I believe this month will shower me extra energy that i needed.

Btw, here i give you a peak of storms in my brain last month.

The Social Media

I really think a lot of my social media platforms, before i dump those ideas and just post whatever and wherever i like until i finally realize i should not wasting my time in social media without having any purpose! At that time hopping on and off from one media to another, i find the silver lining that people really have their own personal liking and tend to stay on one platform. But that’s not me, i can’t choose. I’m never able to. I am an all-or-nothing kinda person. If you have no idea what kind of person i am, this video could help you out.

I thank you Buzzfeed for this video, it comforts me so much to see that some people are also like me and that’s make me not the only weirdo among 7 billion people in this world! This kind of personality also explain the idea why i didn’t post anything last month and why sometimes i can write 5 chapters straight and not write anything until the next year. Yeah you can call it undisciplined.

The idea is that i will use all social media platforms that i already have! And that is plenty, as you can see i have 6 platforms, plus ask. fm and i just have to link everything thoughtfully so i don’t have to waste much time to post everything in every platform and yet my social media still live! And yaaaaaas, i will have vlog! 😉

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The Enigma of Languages 

Another thing that concern me also about languages that i will use in my social media, somehow my target audience are Indonesian, but yet i couldn’t help myself to just keep writing in English (i just want to keep practicing my English and my husband really keen to read my blogs and my poetry). I write seriously (in purpose to be published) in Bahasa tho, but then i lack of Indonesian literature (most of my Indonesia books (which are so little) are in English!) and i don’t know where to buy Indonesian e-books (Google store doesn’t have what i need, help me anyone!!). Argh so confusing really, but then i think like i will write everything in English for the larger range of audience and i will post my vlog in Bahasa with English translation (due to the lack of Indonesian vlog)! Hope it will work!

Still about language, i really concern to improve my English writing skills but i don’t know how. Is there any idea for an online class or any website to visit?

Wife Life

This month, I also thought about how to manage the household while being a student and i am amazed by the fact that there’s so much for me to learn. I am really glad that i have the best husband that just support me and being patient most of the time. Long before i marry, i thought that always being myself is the best thing one can do in life. But now finally i figure, it’s not about being one true self, but it is about being the best of one self. I am really glad that our goal as husband and wife are not being the perfect couple of the year but learning to bring the best of each other every day. There are lots of things to compromise, we figure out together which personality is good and which one needs to be reduce. It feels so hard sometimes, i mean i don’t want my husband to be another authoritative figure in my life, i have my parents for that in years! But then i realize that being a better person is our marriage goal, to keep learning forever until we both reach an eternity of tranquility.

This brainstorming really helps me to plan everything realistically, to understand that i am still not figuring things out correctly, to accept that it’s okay to keep changing, to see one goal by it’s process not the result, to be patient, to be grateful, to see surrealist point of view while being a realist, to be okay when things gone wrong, to be a feminist and a great wife in the same time. Things may not be all done for me last month, but then i am happy, i love myself in another level kind of love. It was May, after all, whatever happens in May always stay wonder.

don't foget to eat ice cream, you guys!!!!

don’t foget to eat ice cream, you guys!!!!

Wife, Husband

Husband:
Verily, you are part of my ribs
Clothes for my body
Guide and guard you, I shall wit

Wife:
Truly, I was incomplete just like you
Before we meet in the midst of lack
Trust you and remind you, i shall do

Husband:
I couldn’t do all your wish
I couldn’t always keep what I promise
Forgive and forget, we better be

Wife:
I will try to be enough even in drought
Thankful for presence and past
For that, smile and please you better are

Husband:
I will

Wife:
But why?

Husband:
It is you and me believing in each other

Wife:
It’s us, striving for the better

Husband&Wife:
I love you

14th prompt of Napowrimo: Dialogue in Poetry

The Faults In Foul Soul

 

 

I stared,  I glared to the love that float

I listened for its swing

I demanded for it to shift

But i did nothing

 

the beauty was too overwhelming

until passive was active

delution made reaction that delete any realization

senseless and brainless, verily

 

they said to be or not to be

infact medieval quotes become irrelevant

for narsisstic mind on twentieth century

now is to be and always be

 

love is irresistable

as for heart is unmanageable

broken heart impose for trivial challange

commitment is presumed to keep balance

 

Obvious, the faults are in the sullied soul

that guilty for tedious dreams

that resist to stop sleeping in foul

to wake up and smell roses